


JayTim Week Summer 2017

by chibi_nightowl



Category: Batman (Comics)
Genre: Drabbles, JayTim Week 2017, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-03
Updated: 2017-08-03
Packaged: 2018-12-10 10:34:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11689857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chibi_nightowl/pseuds/chibi_nightowl
Summary: Prompt fills for JayTim Week Summer 2017, including a cameo from the Tuesday Nights 'verse.





	JayTim Week Summer 2017

**Author's Note:**

> These were all posted on my Tumblr last week and I just remembered I should probably post them here too. They're all drabbles and almost all of them are dialogue only.

Day 1: Heatwave 

"I'm melting." 

"No, you're not." 

"Yes, I am. I just need a bucket of water tossed at me and I'll pull an Elphaba." 

"That's a surprisingly modern literary reference for you. Also, you wear a red helmet. You're not green." 

"Tiiiiiimmmmm..." 

"Fine, give me a moment." 

"I swear to God, only you would leave your thermostat alone during the worst heatwave of the year." 

"I get cold easily." 

"I know, I fight you for the blankets all the time." 

"There. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get my hoodie." 

"Get your ass over here, I'll keep you warm." 

"You're sweating." 

"And now that you've turned down the damn air conditioning, I'll stop. Come here." 

"At least take a shower first." 

"...Fine."

 

***** 

Day 2: Sunburn 

"It burns, precious. It burns us!!" 

"Okay. First, that's a really good Smeagol impersonation you've got goin' on there. Second, sit your fucking ass down so I can smear this aloe shit all over you." 

"Jaaaayyyy..." 

"I know it hurts, Tim, but you're the dumbass who fell asleep by the pool and forgot to put sunblock on." 

"Ow. Geez, your bedside manner sucks." 

"Says the man with the sunburn. By the way, nice tan lines. Your ass is still lily white." 

"You like my ass." 

"If it was burned too, would you want me to kiss it all better?" 

"Is that even a question?" 

 

***** 

Day 3: Popsicles 

"That's obscene." 

"Only you use big words like that on a day like this, Timmers." 

"So? It's still true." 

"What is?" 

"Have you ever watched yourself eat a popsicle before?" 

"Can't say I have. But it's not all that different from something else I put my mouth around." 

" _Jason!_ We're in public!" 

"Cry me a fucking river. I'm sitting on a park bench eating a goddamned popsicle. I highly doubt some kid is going to stare at me and learn the fine art of fellatio in the process." 

"No, but those moms over there seem to be taking notes." 

"It'll be good for them. Spice up their sex lives."

 

***** 

Day 4: Car Wash 

"Why am I here again?" 

"Because I asked you." 

"You sure? This seems more like something you'd bribe or blackmail me into coming to." 

"Do you remember me doing anything like that recently?" 

"No?" 

"Then why are you whining? You get to look at cars for the next two hours." 

"I get to _wash_ cars for the next two hours. There's a difference." 

"Semantics." 

"Very important semantics, Timmy. I have no problem washing my own car. Washing other people's cars, that's where I have an issue." 

"I'll buy you chilidogs and a six pack of beer when we're done here." 

"So when do we start?"

 

***** 

Day 5: Road Trip and Island Vacation 

"Flip for it." 

"No, you cheat." 

"How do I cheat at flipping a coin?" 

"You're Red Robin, I'm sure you know how." 

"I do not cheat. Well, not with this at least. I really am good either way." 

"Seriously? You've got no preference if we go on a road trip or to some island paradise for our vacation?" 

"Nope. As long as I get out of Gotham, I'm good." 

"Is Bruce footing the bill?" 

"He better be, he's the one telling me I need to get away." 

"Simmer down. I'll ask Alfred what he's trying to get done behind your back. You know he likes me best." 

"Thanks."

 

***** 

Day 6: Water guns 

"You ready?" 

"I was born ready."  

"Remember to follow the plan." 

"...Right. The plan..." 

"You weren't listening at all, were you?" 

"Tim, I got two of the best water guns on the market right now to fuck around with and you want me to pay attention to some plan?" 

"You want to win, right?" 

"..." 

"I didn't hear you." 

"I said fine!"  

"Good. Now here's how we're going to beat the girls." 

"Oh, god...Cass is gonna kill me. Again." 

"Not if I take her out first."

 

***** 

Day 7: Gotham Tourist Season 

Jason brings out another order of fried pickles and aioli to a couple sitting near the front door of the bar. He walks back down to where Tim’s sitting, nursing a jack and coke. "Am I missing something?" 

He looks up from his phone. "Hmmm?" 

"There's a shit ton of people around here. This place is usually dead on Tuesday nights." He leaves it unsaid that this is normally _their_ night. With everything going on right now, this is one of the few days of the week he even _sees_ Tim anymore. 

"Well, it is the height of tourist season." 

Jason stares incredulously. "You're fucking with me. Gotham has a _tourist season?"_

"Yes." Tim takes a sip from his soda. 

"Okay, so why the hell is my bar full of tourists?" 

"I don’t know. Maybe they used Yelp and didn’t read the comments about this being a shit neighborhood you don’t go to after dark. Now quit bitching and get back to the kitchen. You've got paying customers." 

Paying customers from out of town who will likely leave here to find the tires from their rental cars gone. He shakes his head. "Fucking tourists."


End file.
